The teen years can be tough because teens face challenges physically, socially, and emotionally. Hormonal shifts occur while they’re still learning to regulate their emotions — a difficult combination.
Some days are going to be tough, while others are filled with laughter. Your relationship with your teen also shifts from idolizing you to a new mystery dynamic each day. As frustrating as it is, it’s a good sign they’re developing.
Here are some tips for handling their ups and downs while still being supportive.
1. Don’t Take it Personally
The adolescent time frame can be difficult, not only for you but for them as well. They’re riddled with stress from pressure to achieve academic success and/or athletic greatness. Friends and social activities can add to the pressure. All this goes on while they’re also trying to figure out their own identity.
As they reach this stage, they naturally want to turn to their friends to help them navigate the various situations. This doesn’t mean you’ve done anything wrong. They just might need to sort through matters on their own first.
Allow them to have that opportunity to problem solve and form meaningful relationships with their friends. Keep an eye out from a distance to make sure nothing critical is happening, but they’ll appreciate the independence.
2. Maintain Boundaries
Another natural habit during the teen years is to push boundaries and be rebellious. While establishing their identity, teens also learn the limits of their freedom.
You want them to be safe. Ideally, you’d love to have them just listen to you, but it’s important to remain level-headed no matter how frustrated you are. Be clear about the boundaries you have set for your household and your relationship, and be consistent in enforcing them.
When dealing with mood swings and resistance, make sure you and your partner present a united front. No good will come if one parent plays “good cop” while the other plays “bad cop.” You’re both stronger and more effective together.
3. Give Space When Needed
Everyone needs space when they’re in a bad mood. Your teen is going to be no different.
When your teen is going through it, it’s normal to want to jump in, and either help fix it or police the situation. Before swooping in to save them, give them space and privacy to handle their emotions.
They may need a good cry, to sit in silence, or decompress while listening to music. Offer them your support and reassure them that you’re there when they want to talk.
4. Encourage a Healthy Lifestyle
Daily stress can easily contribute to mood swings. Having healthy habits and living a healthy lifestyle can help curb some of the downs.
Encourage them to drink plenty of water daily and practice good eating habits. Guide them to eat all their meals and make good food choices with fruits, vegetables, and whole foods. Make sure they are getting quality sleep and plenty of it. Be a good role model and teach them healthy coping strategies.
5. Enjoy Riding the Highs
Not all mood swings are bad ones. You will find that your teen has positive swings that are worth taking time to enjoy with them.
It might involve laughing at dumb jokes or dancing around the living room. Your teen may ask you to join them on an outing or participate in an activity.
If and when this happens, make the time for it. They’re inviting you in. Not every day will be a good day, and these years won’t last forever. Savor this time.
Are you interested in more tips for navigating the ups and downs of your teenager’s mood swings? Contact us to learn more about teen-focused therapy, or read more about our Counseling for Teens services.